The Bullshit Radar
To stay open and curious, learn to trust your gut.
There’s a list of things in my head that I sometimes refer to as the Menu. The Menu is not a collection of dishes, although it has some of those. The menu is also not just a list of things I enjoy. Specifically, it is a growing library of things and activities that bring me back to my senses when I’m getting too lost in my own head. It’s a collection of ways through which I taught myself to manage my anxiety and triggers. Not everything on the menu works for me each time, and so over the years, I’ve also learned the gentle rotation of what restorative activity to deploy when.
The menu was not built overnight, and it took trials and painful errors —
I learned that online psychics don’t work for me, and that I mistrust almost anyone who describes themselves as a mentor. I found that good teachers and therapists empower their students and clients instead of cultivating dependency. I learned not to be dependent on others for healing my traumas, and also (even more slowly and painfully) am learning not to be an ass to others because of said traumas. My Menu includes comfort food, painting, recipes, songs, hot showers, films and poetry, animals, spending time with people I love, gardening, sky-gazing and a wide range of movement-based activities. Often, a walk outdoors is my quickest shortcut to restoring joy.
This does not mean that all or any of these will work for you — but it does mean that your own menu will serve you well.
This week, try to notice what makes your shoulders drop and your jaw unclench. Is there a song that makes you smile when you hear it? Might
it belong on your menu?
Iffy
The Guardian’s exposé on Jay Shetty — podcast host, officiator of JLo and Ben Affleck’s wedding and alleged former monk. Needless to say, I do not know Shetty personally. His talks have rarely blown my mind, and I find Hollywood’s fascination with him fascinating. I also failed to understand the point of this exposé which at worst, paints Shetty out to be an influencer who plagiarises others on the internet (the shock!), lies about what universities his business is affiliated to and also possibly was a monk for a shorter duration of time than he originally claimed. Shetty might be a scammer, but is he dangerous? I need to hear your thoughts!
Helpful
This illustrated book of Bad Arguments (all pages are viewable online) for when that co-worker or internet racist is driving you nuts.
Ecstatic
I was once indifferent to Arabic music (a fool was I) but five years of bellydancing have made me a convert — there are of course, genres within this genre and my current favourite is Tarab with a heady mix of jazz.
"Loosely translated to “enchantment,” tarab is an Arabic word describing a deep, stirring musical performance that launches the audience into a trance-like state of ecstasy. The creation of tarab by an artist or musical piece is difficult to pinpoint. Whether it be a result of poignant, lilting vocals, mesmerizing riffs, stirring instrumentals or profound lyrics, these seemingly mystical components culminate to create an experience of utter mesmerization, a world in which all that exists is the music and the intense bodily response one has to hearing it.”